A team of researchers in the Brown Department of Psychology have identified an alarming trend among college students - stonerexia. Though the more common forms of "-rexias" are "definitely and totally known across the country," said Robert McCamferty, professor of psychology and lead author of the paper - published in Psychology Today last week - the new trend is "particularly alarming."
The "disease," McCamferty said, is characterized by a person's unwillingness to consume nourishment throughout the day in anticipation of what he called "the munchies."
"After a particularly intense social event in which marijuana is inhaled, ingested, vaporized or bonged, people often find themselves desperately searching for something cheesy or sugary," he said. These unstoppable feasts - during which participants can consume entire pizzas or pans of cookies before realizing they are even eating - can drive "stoners" to save on calories throughout the day so that they can gorge themselves without guilt.
"When I'm in that state where I subconsciously find myself methodically dipping my hands into a carton of goldfish, I don't want to have to think about the burger I consumed earlier in the day," said Jay Gold '10, a self-described "connossieur of herbal refreshments."
"There are few things as pleasurable as eating stoned," echoed Barry Man '09, who was holding a suspiciously pipe-like implement at the time of the interview. "So, I mean, why would I eat unless food could taste three million times better?"
