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Diamonds and Coal

Diamonds & Coal, March 11

Friday, March 11, 2011

Coal to BCA Spring Weekend pick and indie rock band TV on the Radio. We did not expect to be watching TV during Spring Weekend, but it looks like now we will be.

A diamond to Vice President for Campus Life and Student Services Margaret Klawunn, who met with the owner of Colosseum nightclub March 3 and reported, “We reviewed some of the things that had been problems with the Wednesday nights at Fish Co. and some of the ways that we were concerned about a continuation of anything that might raise some of the similar problems.” We’re glad University Hall agrees $4 beers have got to go.

A cubic zirconium to University of Rhode Island Professor Scott Molloy, who said “I think it’s the best thing that ever happened to labor in a long time, because instead of the usual Halloween costumes and subterfuge, this stuff is right up front.” So even if union members all lose their jobs, it sounds like they’re at least invited to Sex Power God.

Coal to the Alpert Medical School for considering giving iPads to all first- and second-year medical students. On a related note, the University is considering giving BuDS workers Nintendos and the faculty might all get ponies.

A diamond to Gov. Lincoln Chafee ’75 P’14 who proposed taxing textbooks to close the state’s budget gap in his address to the General Assembly Tuesday night. Brown students had been running out of excuses, and “the governor taxed it” beats the heck out of “my dog ate it.”

Coal to Professor of Political Science Mark Blyth, who, when asked if he had noticed that the bell atop University Hall had not been ringing, responded, “Which bells?” What, had you been Blyth-ly ignoring them?

Coal to the embattled president who has ignored calls for his abdication and entrenched himself despite open revolt. Sorry, John Maeda of RISD, it may be time you took your services elsewhere. We hear Egypt’s looking.

A diamond to Sunday’s convocation of the inaugural class of the IE Brown Executive M.B.A. Program, which pairs the University with a for-profit Spanish business school to grant master’s of business degrees, largely through online learning. Looks like Diddy’s not the only one with dirty money.


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