Former "The Real World: Chicago" cast member Chris Beckman has struggled with substance abuse since adolescence. Thursday night, Beckman told a small and attentive crowd in MacMillan 117 that overcoming his addictions has been one of the most trying experiences of his life.
"I had to learn how to have fun all over again, without the drugs," he said.
The event was sponsored by the Brown Lecture Board.
Although he may be best known for appearing on MTV's "The Real World: Chicago," which ended in 2002, Beckman has since spent his time giving public lectures, regularly touring the nation to warn against the dangers of substance abuse.
"We're happy he wanted to come," said Brown Lecture Board co-president Felicity Rose '06. "Hopefully, he's a different kind of speaker for Brown."
During the hour-long talk, Beckman described how he first turned to alcohol as an 11-year-old looking for "an escape - a magical moment." From there, his substance addiction grew to include drugs like marijuana, Ecstasy and crystal methamphetamine.
Once Beckman enrolled at Suffolk University in Boston, his substance abuse problem only got worse. "I started lying to myself and my family," he said. It was only later that he realized this "habit ... took what was important to me - my family and friends - away, one by one."
However, after a drunken driving-related car accident and his "clarity moment" - a friend telling him he was no longer reliable - Beckman decided to get his life back on track. He joined an outpatient detoxification center and a 12-step group in Chicago that gave him support and "became my family," he said. Beckman has been sober for nearly five years.
Beckman also spoke at length about his time spent on "The Real World."
The show was a "halfway house" that helped him stay clean, he said. Being on the show also helped him develop a "thick skin," especially since the filming took place during a difficult time in his life, when he had only been sober for three months.
His feelings about the show, though mostly positive, none-theless carried a hint of embarrassment.
"If you didn't see it Tuesdays at 10, you'll be able to watch it for the next 25 years on marathon weekends," he quipped. Although it was a "stressful living situation," he still sees it as a gift to have "Real World" in his life.
During the question-and-answer session, Beckman also addressed the issues facing young gay men in the United States. He did not audition for the show with the intention of being a gay rights advocate, but he slowly came to feel that it was his "mission to create awareness," he said.
Beckman is the author of the book "Clean: A New Generation in Recovery Speaks Out," which is based on his and others' experiences dealing with substance addiction.
"It was put together for people to ... understand what the disease of alcoholism is," Beckman said. He added that writing the book was an important event that helped him "lessen the shame" of his own experiences.
Rose said the book is about "recovering from addiction as a young person, which is very different than as a 50-year-old." Beckman's book provides facts and information about recovery for young people and their families, she said.
Beckman ended on an upbeat note, advising students to "be more responsible and don't let it get to a point where it gets out of control."
Audience members responded positively to Beckman's intimate speech.
"I thought it was interesting how he felt the need to share a lot of his personal experiences," Emily Seltzer '08 said. "If you watched the show, you know they really didn't show a lot of his personality." She said the lecture served as a good opportunity for Beckman to "let loose about his past."
Raf Flores '08 appreciated that Beckman "was able to cover so many different topics. ... It was like (killing) five birds with one stone."
"And he's cute," Flores added.
