Sofia Unanue '11 has, by now, observed her roommate's daily rituals enough times to know them by heart.
"In the morning, Sam wakes up, goes to take a shower, looks in the mirror, puts on purple tighty-whities..."
"They're not tighty-whities; they're boxer briefs!"
Sam Yambrovich '11 and Unanue are typical roommates in all but one sense: Yambrovich is male and Unanue is female.
Last spring, the Office of Residential Life announced that for the first time, certain doubles on campus would be designated as gender-neutral. For the pilot program, ResLife strategically chose six residence halls, comprising about a third of upperclassmen doubles. Only four rooms were chosen in the housing lottery by mixed gender groups though, according to ResLife.
Richard Bova, senior associate dean of Residential Life, speculated that the small number could be in part due to groups choosing suites or apartments, rather than traditional doubles, in the housing lottery. He also suggested that the novelty of the program might have impacted the numbers.
Still, Yambrovich and Unanue were surprised to hear they were in such a small minority.
"Granted, it's the first year and it wasn't widely publicized, but still, I couldn't believe it," Yambrovich said. "This is Brown!"
But they didn't choose their living arrangement to make a statement. It was simply what made the most sense.
Last spring, the two were friendly but did not know each other well. They were in a lottery group of eight, hoping to get doubles or a suite. The other six paired off before the lottery, however, leaving Yambrovich and Unanue as the odd ones out.
"We were at dance one day," Unanue recalled, "and I was like, 'Dude, I don't have anyone to live with. Will you live with me?'"
Both admit now that they were nervous last spring, and not entirely sure they could live together. But they entered the lottery together and the group of eight was able to secure four doubles nearby in Harkness House.
Over the summer, Yambrovich and Unanue were coincidentally both in Madrid. They lived together for 10 days, had a fantastic time and returned to school much more confident about their arrangement, they said.
Their friends find it "hilarious" that the two are roommates, though.
"We're kind of polar opposites," Yambrovich explained. "I have a shelf full of cleaning products; she has a laundry basket full of dirty clothes."
But when it comes to their different genders, neither feels uncomfortable. They attribute that in large part, though, to the fact that Yambrovich is gay.
"Otherwise, it would be really hard," Unanue said. "There's always sexual tension."
"We even have some," Yambrovich joked.
"Sam!"
"When I told my mom, the first thing I had to tell her was, 'He's gay,'" Unanue explained. "'Don't worry, he's not going to be my boyfriend.' That was a big relief."
Unanue said her mom has since met Yambrovich, and is "obsessed" with him.
Yambrovich's situation is somewhat different: his parents think he lives in a single. They are coming to visit in two weeks, which both said should be interesting.
"I can completely see my parents being like, 'What? You can't do that!'" Yambrovich said.
Yambrovich said he acknowledges the opposition from the Brown community at large - including alumni and parents - when the policy was instituted, "but I never understand why," he said.
"If I'm more comfortable living with Sofia, who's a girl, why shouldn't I have that option?"
For Bova, that's the main reason to allow gender-neutral housing. He said he wants to ensure that all students feel safe and comfortable in their housing environments, and for some students, the option that makes them happiest may not be the traditional housing model.
So far, he said, the eight students living in gender-neutral rooms seem to be pleased with their setup, but ResLife will continue to monitor the results of the new policy throughout the year.
For Blaine Martin '11 and Gan Uyeda '11, the experience has been equally positive. The two - Martin is female and Uyeda is male - were neighbors and good friends freshman year and entered the housing lottery as a group of four with two girls, planning to choose a suite.
But with a poor lottery number, all of the desirable suites were gone by the time their number was called. However, the group had a long list of backup options, and with the new gender-neutral policy they were able to choose two nearby doubles in Marcy House and all stay together.
For them, the choice was just the most convenient option. "I don't have any close guy friends that I would want to live with," Uyeda said, "and I feel comfortable living with Blaine."
Uyeda said the arrangement really doesn't feel different than his experience last year living in a traditional single-gender double.
"There are little privacy things," Martin said, "but it was the same last year with my roommate."
Both of their parents are comfortable with the concept, which was important to Uyeda and Martin. Uyeda said his mom is proud of how progressive and open Brown is, and thinks the living arrangement is amazing.
Even if few students continue to take advantage of the opportunity, Uyeda and Martin feel gender-neutral housing needs to remain an option. Students should be allowed to live in whatever manner makes them feel most comfortable, the pair said. Without the gender-neutral policy, their housing options would have been very restricted, Martin added. Yambrovich and Unanue said having two genders in one room creates a balanced energy. "We have different routines and rituals that we follow," Yambrovich said.
And from an emotional standpoint, Unanue said she finds it comforting to live with Yambrovich instead of another girl. It alleviates a lot of drama, she said. "Everyone's rooting for each other; there is no jealousy. I would never be attracted to the same man he brings in."
And as a bonus, he carried all of her boxes during move-in.
Life inside their double has been stress-free so far, they said. They have yet to encounter any "weird moments." And just like any other set of roommates, they respect each other's privacy and sleeping habits.
"I'm very quiet," Yambrovich said. "I'm like a spy ... I can sneak around."
Yambrovich and Unanue arranged their room with the furniture against the walls and an open space in the middle to make it more conducive to socializing. Their door is always open and their friends are constantly running in and out. The two have very busy schedules. Even though they have been at school for almost a month, they said they are barely ever in the room.
The arrangement is still new and different, however, regardless of how smooth the transition has been.
"The other day, Sam was sleeping in the room," Unanue recalled. "I walked in and I was like, 'Holy sh*t! There's a man in my room!' And then I was like, 'Wait, I'm living with Sam.'"
