The 21st century has birthed a strange world — one in which apps like TikTok have the ability to change the trajectory of an artist’s career. For Lola Young, that life-altering moment occurred in November 2024, when influencer Jake Shane posted a TikTok set to her track “Messy.” The song, featured in Young’s 2024 album “This Wasn’t Meant For You Anyway,” quickly shot to the top of the Billboard pop airplay chart and turned Young into a bonafide superstar.
On Sept. 19, Young returned with her third album “I’m Only F**king Myself,” complete with all the lyrical and sonic elements that made “Messy” a hit. In around 45 minutes, Young dives deep into the turmoil of toxic relationships, drug use and self-sabotage. The album doesn’t posture — instead, Young luxuriates in the havoc of clever hooks and immersive soundscapes.
On the opening track, “how long will it take to walk a mile? (interlude),” a young narrator introduces the record with an innocence that is soon complicated by the difficult subject matter Young takes on. The album’s concluding track, “ur an absolute c word (interlude),” features a brief spoken word poem credited to Tia Shek, a spoken-word artist and friend of Young. Young’s interjection at the end juxtaposes softness with vulgarity. Across “I’m Only F**king Myself,” Young dances on the knife’s edge of tenderness and bitterness.
The song’s lead single “One Thing” was released on May 16 and also became a TikTok sensation. While not the most sonically or lyrically expansive track on the record, “One Thing” has the “it-factor” that “Messy” had. Young’s powerful vocals, as well as the song’s lively and retro production, enhance the track’s provocative lyrics. “d£aler” is another notable single from the record. Released on July 25, the song explores leaving behind a difficult life and a love gone sour. Young subverts the expectations of traditional breakup songs and presents an unusual suspect for her longing — her drug dealer. She sings, “I wanna get away, far from here / Pack my bags and tell my dealer I’ll miss him.” The song’s gritty sound works well with Young’s raw vocals.
“F**K EVERYONE” is a hedonistic anthem with crashing percussion and subtle voice distortion. While the song’s crass subject matter may not be everyone’s cup of tea, it embodies one compelling spectrum of the record: Young’s willingness to delve deep into female sexuality and turn the taboo into a celebration of freedom. While sexual liberation has always been an object of criticism in the media, Young’s lyricism imbues it with a humanity that is incredibly refreshing.
In “Penny Out of Nothing,” Young acknowledges her own role in the turbulence of a toxic relationship. Lyrics like “Don’t you dare walk away / I’m not done lying to your face” highlight the almost hyperbolic nature of the track. The song brings drama to the album with high-stakes lyricism and a rousing soundscape. Flutters of electric screeching in the song’s production add a sense of dissonance — Young knows that her behavior is wrong, yet she can’t seem to stop. “why do i feel better when i hurt you?” is similarly reflective. The song’s subdued sound accompanies Young’s contemplations on her behavior: “Why do I feel better when I hurt you? / Always try to put you in the worst mood.”
“Walk All Over You” is strangely lighthearted, even though Young laments the shortcomings of an unthinking partner. Singing “And do you know the difference between me and you? / Well, you loved me for your ego, I loved you for you,” Young breaks through her image as a fearless rock star and emerges vulnerable and sensitive. This is the beauty of “I’m Only F**king Myself” — in the midst of coarseness, there is a sincerity that keeps listeners hooked.
The shining points of the record are the tracks where Young combines this vulnerability with typical pop-rock elements. “SPIDERS” is dark and moody, spotlighting Young’s powerful vocals. She flexes her talents in an explosive chorus that features belting and crashing drums. The song imagines intimacy in the act of a partner killing spiders in a bedroom — it is a haunting song that sees Young at her best.
“Post Sex Clarity” is another standout on the album. The song’s sensual sound plays along to Young’s unguarded lyrics, which culminate in an infectious hook: “When I’m lyin’ in bed, got post-sex clarity / I still love you, and I don’t know why / ‘Cause every other man didn’t mean a God damn to me / When I finish, it’s not the end of you and I.”
How is it possible that Young can sing about untethered sex on “F**K EVERYONE,” but also wish for more than just a hookup on “Post Sex Clarity”? The magic lies in Young’s willingness to be brutally honest and sit in the uncomfortable on “I’m Only F**king Myself.” The album doesn’t convey a clear-cut message: Instead, Young pushes listeners to sit with the complications of love, sex and youth. She proudly vacillates in her perspectives, emotions and behaviors in a raw and purely human body of work.
“who f**king cares?” masters the balancing act between these contradictions. Stripped down and featuring a single acoustic guitar, the song sees Young angry, self-critical and prideful. The sonic chaos of the preceding songs meets a violent end in this track, during which Young’s beautiful lyrics and evocative voice dominate.
“SAD SOB STORY :)” and “CAN WE IGNORE IT? :(“ appear as a pair on the record. The former explores the bittersweet experience of leaving behind a difficult relationship, while the latter rejects self-reflection as Young seeks to forget her problems “even for just one day.”
While “I’m Only F**king Myself” is a strong addition to Young’s discography, it has its weak points. “Not Like That Anymore” has some questionable lyrical choices — “I like a dopamine hit more than a fat kid loves cake” — and isn’t particularly memorable.
Listeners who only know Young from TikTok clips sell her terribly short. “I’m Only F**king Myself” is scandalous, relatable and deeply sensitive. Young brings with her an acute awareness of what lies beneath the surface of parties, drugs and sex — this is at the heart of what makes her such a compelling storyteller and performer.
Alyssia Ouhocine is a Senior Staff Writer covering Arts & Culture. Hailing from Bayonne, New Jersey, she is concentrating in English and History with a particular interest in Algerian history and literature. When she’s not writing, she can be found listening to music and sending Google Calendar invites.
