My encounter with John Paul II
By Gavin Shulman | April 19I, for one, am sad about the passing of the pope.
I, for one, am sad about the passing of the pope.
Just a few minutes ago, the word "judgement" appeared on the television screen. My friend Mike, who takes grammatical things serious, got real mad. "That's not how it's spelled, dammit," he said to the television screen.
I feel like being Topical. Like a warm paradise. Like an island. Like a storm. I feel like talking about what's happening. Now. I feel like being dated.
So who you going to give that Valentine's Day card to? Are you going to give someone a V-card? I can't believe I'm actually going to exchange my V-card. What a beautiful display of love. An index card colored in pink and heart-themed.
As a sports fan, I find it disconcerting how predisposed people are to seeing the negative in most modern sports scandals, and how blind they are to the potential positive of what may seem like sports' most controversial stories.
Let me be one of the first of the current generation of students to acknowledge and laud you for the charitable generosity that you have shown our beloved University. I believe I speak for everyone when I say, "much appreciated." The new buildings will be beautiful, the new walk-ways will be wonderful ...
I am writing this column a changed man. A fitter man, a thinner man, a better man. A man who has seen the dark, morbid depths of obesity. A man with pounds upon pounds of past. And, proudly, a man who has risen out of the wheezing blackness of fatness with a much stronger and more well-balanced diet. ...
I was planning on proposing what I believed was a better way to solve this highly contested election than voting. I was going to suggest that we could just split the country in half.